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 post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!

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crafsmankiller
Screwdriver
Screwdriver


Age : 23
Join date : 2012-10-18
Posts : 412
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Location : livingston texas

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeMon Feb 25, 2013 3:49 pm

post your favorite jokes in this thread.
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ibdalovely1
Forum Newbie
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ibdalovely1

Age : 41
Join date : 2012-12-27
Posts : 92
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Location : dayton ohio

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PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeFri Mar 22, 2013 3:15 pm



A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump out
across the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid hitting it,
but unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in front of the car. The
driver, a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulls over
and gets out to see what has become of the rabbit.

Much to his dismay, the rabbit is dead.

The driver feels so awful that he begins to cry.

A beautiful blonde woman driving down the highway sees a
man crying on the side of a road and pulls over. She steps out
of the car and asks the man what’s wrong.

“I feel terrible,” he explains, “I accidentally hit this rabbit and
killed it.”

The blonde says, “Don’t worry.” She runs to her car and pulls
out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit, bends
down, and sprays the contents onto the rabbit.

The rabbit jumps up, waves its paw at the two of them and hops
off down the road.

Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again,
he hops down the road another 10 feet, turns and waves, hops
another ten feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and
again and again, until he hops out of sight.

The man is astonished.

He runs over to the woman and demands,”What is in that can?”
The woman turns the can around so that the man can read the
label. It says . .

(Are you ready for this?)

(Are you sure?)

(This is bad!)

(You know you could just click off and not read the punchline)

(You know your gonna be sorry)

(Last chance)

(OK, here it is)

… It says, “Hair Spray – Restores life to dead hair, adds
permanent wave.”
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Doug
Administrator
Administrator
Doug

Age : 25
Join date : 2012-12-24
Posts : 2951
Forum Rep : 71
Location : Lebanon County, PA

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeFri Mar 22, 2013 3:39 pm

I will say this now before it happens, but keep it clean with the jokes in here. No racial or religious jokes, and try not to urn it into a flame thread my picking on other people or brands.

_______________________________________________
Head Forum Administrator ** Chat Moderator ** Facebook Page Admin
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Have a question? Ask me! Type in "@Doug" in your post!

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TheRainbowBoxer
Moderator
Moderator
TheRainbowBoxer

Age : 46
Join date : 2012-04-23
Posts : 1062
Forum Rep : 13
Location : Galion, OH

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PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeFri Mar 22, 2013 4:23 pm

Found online:


Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn't do something about it.

So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed.

Tom slept well, and in fact, beat the alarm in the morning. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work. "Boss", he said, "The pill actually worked!"

"That's all fine" said the boss, "But where were you yesterday?"

_______________________________________________
Proud member of the Mower Cycle Gang... aka the "Mowrons!"

My build (Chaos is one of 3 built like this)
Chaos Build

The Mower Cycle Gang visited 1puglife in May 2014
Check out the pics and vids!

Haspin 2020 was a blast!  Check out pics and vids here
Haspin 2020 thread

Join us for the annual Mowron-fest at Haspin Acres!
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Check out my YouTube for more tractor action, my vlog, and my bus build!
TheRainbowBoxer on YouTube
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Tractor Man Jeff
Moderator
Moderator
Tractor Man Jeff

Age : 26
Join date : 2012-06-26
Posts : 492
Forum Rep : 0
Location : Back in the sticks of VA

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PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeSun Mar 24, 2013 4:36 pm

Doug Fackler wrote:
I will say this now before it happens, but keep it clean with the jokes in here. No racial or religious jokes, and try not to urn it into a flame thread my picking on other people or brands.
Yes please. Keep it clean. I might be best not to tease to many people Doug. That way you wouldn't be involved in any flame ups if it happens. I love that first one. Laughing

_______________________________________________
My truck: 1986 Ford F-350 Cab&Chassis, IH 6.9L diesel V8, BW T-19 4 speed with granny gear, 2wd, 9ft Knaphiede westerner flatbed.
My tractor: Craftsman LT1000, 17HP Briggs Now a 20HP Briggs Apposed Twin, 6 speed Dana Trans-axle pulley swapped to 15MPH, golf cart front suspension and tires, ATV tires on the back, Rear ATV rack, front brush guard.

"An unconfirmed piece of junk in someones eyes can always be turned into a confirmed piece of art in your eyes."
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ibdalovely1
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ibdalovely1

Age : 41
Join date : 2012-12-27
Posts : 92
Forum Rep : 0
Location : dayton ohio

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeSun Mar 24, 2013 4:40 pm

my gndpa told me that one years ago
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crafsmankiller
Screwdriver
Screwdriver


Age : 23
Join date : 2012-10-18
Posts : 412
Forum Rep : 0
Location : livingston texas

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeThu Mar 28, 2013 8:09 am

keep 'em coming. i want at least 30 pages of jokes on here.
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ibdalovely1
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ibdalovely1

Age : 41
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Posts : 92
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Location : dayton ohio

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeSun Mar 31, 2013 1:49 am

Why dose the bunny rabbit hide the eggs

i will edit this sunday after 5-6pm unless some one gets it
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dylansrockinrigs
Screwdriver
Screwdriver
dylansrockinrigs

Age : 21
Join date : 2012-02-28
Posts : 306
Forum Rep : 0
Location : Silk Hope N.C.

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PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeSun Mar 31, 2013 6:55 pm

This one might be pushing it but its an Easter Joke and today is Easter.

The preacher was speaking in front of the congregation and he had all the children in the front,
He was talking about the resurrection of Jesus on Easter and he asked the children if anyone knows what a resurrection is and one kid said,
I don't know what is but if last for more than 4 hours you got to go see a doctor.

The preacher was laughing to hard to punish him.
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ibdalovely1
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ibdalovely1

Age : 41
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Posts : 92
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Location : dayton ohio

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeSun Mar 31, 2013 11:15 pm

Why dose the bunny rabbit hide the eggs cause he dident want to let his wife know he was messing with a chicken
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mudmonkey06
Screwdriver
Screwdriver
mudmonkey06

Age : 24
Join date : 2013-03-18
Posts : 326
Forum Rep : 0
Location : Rindge, NH

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeMon Apr 01, 2013 6:14 am

lol PEANUTBUTTER!!!!!!!!!
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WellThatsSurprising
Screwdriver
Screwdriver
WellThatsSurprising

Age : 23
Join date : 2012-04-30
Posts : 407
Forum Rep : 1
Location : East Bethel, MN

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeMon Apr 01, 2013 11:58 am

@mudmonkey06 wrote:
lol PEANUTBUTTER!!!!!!!!!
Ohhhhhhh, I get it!

_______________________________________________
post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! 2afkj710

Quote :
[23:05:43] Doug Fackler : YOU ARE A ROUND CITRUS FRUIT WITH A JUICY INSIDE
[23:06:20] WellThatsSuprising : YOU BASTARD HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT
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Doug
Administrator
Administrator
Doug

Age : 25
Join date : 2012-12-24
Posts : 2951
Forum Rep : 71
Location : Lebanon County, PA

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeMon Apr 01, 2013 12:00 pm

Whats red and looks like a bucket?

Spoiler:
 

_______________________________________________
Head Forum Administrator ** Chat Moderator ** Facebook Page Admin
ATLTF Facebook Page ** Chatbox ** How To Upload Pictures

_X_ FORUM ANNOUNCEMENTS _X_


Have a question? Ask me! Type in "@Doug" in your post!

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Moderators: @TheRainbowBoxer, @AllisKidD21




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mudmonkey06
Screwdriver
Screwdriver
mudmonkey06

Age : 24
Join date : 2013-03-18
Posts : 326
Forum Rep : 0
Location : Rindge, NH

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeMon Apr 01, 2013 4:09 pm

WellThatsSuprising wrote:
@mudmonkey06 wrote:
lol PEANUTBUTTER!!!!!!!!!
Ohhhhhhh, I get it!
finally its about time someone gets it lol
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ibdalovely1
Forum Newbie
Forum Newbie
ibdalovely1

Age : 41
Join date : 2012-12-27
Posts : 92
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Location : dayton ohio

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeFri Apr 12, 2013 12:21 pm

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed nicely made up and everything neat and tidy.

Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with you and Mom.

I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice. I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes and because she is so much older than I am but it's not only the passion, Dad, she's pregnant.

Joan says that we are going to be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood, enough for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Joan has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Joan can get better; she sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your son, Sandy

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my desk drawer.

I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home!Smile
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ibdalovely1
Forum Newbie
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ibdalovely1

Age : 41
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Posts : 92
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Location : dayton ohio

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeFri Apr 12, 2013 12:26 pm

An elderly couple were driving across the country.
The woman was driving when she got pulled over by the highway patrol.
The officer said, "Ma'am did you know you were speeding?"

The woman, hard of hearing, turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say?"
The old man yells, "He says you were speeding!"

The patrolman says, "May I see your license?"
The woman turns to her husband and asks again, "What did he say?"
The old man yells, "He wants to see your license!"
The woman gave the officer her license.

The patrolman says, "I see you are from Arkansas. I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I've ever seen."

The woman turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?"

And the old man yells, "He said he knows you!"Smile
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ibdalovely1
Forum Newbie
Forum Newbie
ibdalovely1

Age : 41
Join date : 2012-12-27
Posts : 92
Forum Rep : 0
Location : dayton ohio

post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitimeSat Apr 13, 2013 1:49 am

A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds, and he entered a patient's room to find his patient sitting on the floor, sawing at a piece of wood with the side of his hand. Meanwhile, another patient was in the room, hanging from the ceiling by his feet.The doctor asked his patient what he was doing, sitting on the floor.

The patient replied in an irritated fashion, "Can't you see I'm sawing this piece of wood in half?"

The doctor inquired, "And what is the fellow hanging from the ceiling doing?"

"Oh. He's my friend, but he's a little crazy. He thinks he's a light bulb."

The doctor asks, "If he's your friend, don't you think you should get him down from there before he hurts himself?"

"What? And work in the dark?"Smile
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post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Empty
PostSubject: Re: post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!!   post your favorite jokes here!!!!!!!!!!!! Icon_minitime

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